Race Day Reflections

Race day finally arrived bright and early this morning.  The day itself was overcast and gray, but muggy.  We had no rain out on the course though and for that I was certainly grateful!  It was so interesting the things that came back to me as I pulled into the parking area of Ellms Farm.  I instantly became nervous.  Running Anxiety.  I have had it enough times to now think it just must be a thing.  If it does not exist in the DSM, I would maintain that it certainly should.  My favorite sidekick and I took off for the check in and got our bibs and we were ready to roll.  The thing I noticed first was the course had been changed.  The start line was last year's finish line and vice versa.  So much for having confidence in the course.  Enter worsening running anxiety.....although I will say I did my best to cover this for a well crafted selfie, because in the golden age of social media, all important events require the well crafted selfie.  This being my first race since breaking my hip certainly qualified as an important event.

Finally the air horn blew and we were off.  Climbing over the incline shown behind us and down the first slide off to the gravel trail.  OK....in that moment I realized there were two problems with this scenario.  I had failed to consider that inflatable obstacles are not stable.  Rocking and rolling and being tossed around.  In this moment I had to add yet another thing to my list of things that were completely different after a hip fracture.  I believe I have now started to get to the place where my life is broken up into two parts in terms of exercise.  There is the BHF (before hip fracture) and AHF, (after hip fracture).  I realized the instability of the obstacles was probably the most challenging and I had to take them on much slower than I did last year.  I am proud to say I did complete them all.  I shall now be queen of the bounce house.  Problem number two was running on gravel.  I have run a lot in the last 2.5 months.  I have gone as far as 4 miles at a time.....yeah on the treadmill or the flat, paved, bike path.  Gravel was a bit more challenging not because it hurt, but it fed my fear of falling AHF quite well.  For the record, this is a very healthy, nearly irrational at times, fear.  Drops of water on the tile floor, ice outside, a kid quickly zig zagging in front of me all seem to provoke a fairly emotional reaction.  Anyway, the instability of the obstacles and the gravel both got my wheels turning as to what types of training I will need to do to help with stability issues.  I see regular dates with a bosu ball in my future...

What was so ironic about all of this was last year, the running was hard.  I could not run the whole way because, by that time, unbeknownst to me my hip already had a stress fracture.  Running hurt.  The cardiovascular piece was not there either.  So, those bouncy obstacles were the best part of the race.  Today, all in, we ran it all finishing the whole thing in 35 minutes.  Down the last stretch we came around the corner and were instantly disappointed it was over.  Last year, as I came up that hill I committed to running the last little bit and finish strong.  Now, that same run was the easiest and I once again realized my running anxiety was such a waste of time especially in light of the fancy metal and finisher's shirt I scored at the end. Anyone who has raced before knows this to be the best part.  Now if only I could score a Queen of the Bounce House Tiara to show off to my Spartan Racing pals...

Probably my favorite thing about today came through Timehop.  It was a meme that I posted a year ago as I struggled to keep going.  As I have talked about before, staying on the path to health and fitness can be really hard.  It truly is a solo journey which is easy to walk away from when the only one you are truly accountable to is yourself and the past attempts at walking this road had resulted in dismal failure. A year ago I still had significant weight to lose.  I was in pain with my hip and stretched thin with work and family.  Working out at OrangeTheory was still very hard even taking the easier options on things.  There were moments I questioned if I could keep going or even if I could ever get where I truly wanted to be.  I must have had one of those moments exactly one year ago today when I posted this. 

 

 

 

Honestly?  I think I am finding out.....